Wowzah!  It has been a really long time since I’ve written [publicly] in this blog.  And not for lack of thinking about personal finances, either.  More like, just avoiding writing about it.

There has been a major overhaul in how I manage money…

I moved our family savings account to a completely different bank than where our checking accounts are held.  I opened a savings account for both my children at the same bank as our family savings so I have a place to put their gifted money – a place that is separate from our checking account.  One positive aspect of having an out of sight out of mind relationship with money is that [hopefully] I can deposit it into an account and forget about it, providing said account is not linked to my checking account that I have very easy access to (debit card, bill pay, paypal, and checks) and that I can look at on-line.

I was causing the rapid depletion of our savings by “borrowing” from it more than depositing.  I would often pay it back and then just borrow again shortly after.  It got really ridiculous during the summer months when I found myself spending way too much on entertainment.  I continued to keep a list of everything I bought despite not sharing it publicly.  And let me tell you, stupid, stupid, stupid shit was bought out of laziness, boredom, and a weird sense of entitlement.  Next summer, I suspect since Max and Bella will be a year older [Bella being especially easier to manage in public spaces], and I being a year wiser, our summer entertainment will consist of a lot more free events and outings.

The other financially damaging move I was consistently making was letting my credit card that is connected to my checking account pick up the tabs of my over drafts.  I had the attitude, “Eh, I’ll just pay it off when I get the bill,” which by the way, I was very good at doing.  However, the bill was always between $300-$600 every month.  What this told me was that not only was I spending a lot of money on frivolous stuff (keeping track of every purchase brought this habit to my attention) but I was spending money before it was even deposited into my checking account (because, you see, I’d also forget to borrow from my savings).

So, yes, I “have” the money to spend (or save – but not both), but since I never paid attention to my checking account balance unless it was to transfer money from savings to checking, I was spending and paying bills when we didn’t have the money.

I was not paying attention to when Hal’s and my money was being deposited because I had two false security blankets: a savings account connected to our checking (that was, by the way, actually Max’s savings account), and a credit card connected to our checking.  Two things that when I signed up for them, I believed to be a smart move.  Now, I think they only served to make it harder for me to be financially aware, responsible, and successful.  It made it easier to not pay attention.  False.  Security.  Blankets.

I have no access to our savings account unless I physically go to the bank and withdrawal it.  No online access and no debit card (which they actually offered, seems antithetical to a “savings” account).

Now that Max is in school, I am finding it to be easier to not spend as much money.  I’m paying attention to my checking account because I took away those security blankets and will pay a steep fine (30 bucks per overdraft) if I don’t pay attention.  This was a big move for me and it is, quite frankly, very embarrassing and enraging that I didn’t know to do it sooner.

On working outside the home…

I started calling job placement agencies to explore my options in going back to work.  Social security disability offers job placement services free with no penalties towards your disability income.  The idea being that, yes, most people do want to work and would work if they could find a job that respected their physical and/or mental limitations.  I think this is a really great program that the government offers.  I can make up to $700/month and not have my disability income taken away.  This is a huge relief to many folks on disability because most people can’t live off of what they receive through SSD.  Personally, I’d like to find a job that I like so when I no longer need SSD, my job that I can work at while in school is in place.  Hopefully I’ll be off SSD in two years tops.